I’ve always said about Ramona Jane Singer that she might be a freak, but at least she’s our freak. Well, just like when Big Bird caught Grover in bed with Snuffleupagus, it’s time to throw that monster out with the trash. (Wait, so wouldn’t that be Oscar? Ugh, that Sesame Street the metaphor no longer tickles my Elmo.) The thing we’ve always known about Ramona is that she tends to make every situation on her own. Sure. Well. This is what all the great practitioners of the reality TV arts and sciences do. But no one took that egocentricity and turned it into a malignancy like Ramona.
Just show her around a $ 17.9million two-bedroom apartment with a failure Million Dollar List show person and sixth housewife, Michael Lorber. Ramona took a 75 hour course to get her real estate license because she says she is bored and enjoys earning money. She also needs a screenplay for the second season of Handmaid’s Tale. She is only three courses away from eligibility. Yes, that means Ramona is a prix fixe menu far from terrorizing Manhattan’s wealthy in a whole new way.
This tour is a trial run, and Michael enlisted his friend Jordan, presumably another gay man from Sag Harbor, to come from Connecticut for an afternoon of harassment by the world’s worst salesman in a Chanel suit. The star of the show should be the apartment, but Ramona does it all for herself. She talks about her dizziness looking out the windows; she talks about how Michael interrupts her; she talks about where she would put a grand piano in the apartment as if she were already moving into her furniture. Ramona, this guy has no interest in buying you, and after this performance, which was worse than his tap dancing on new floors in his high heels, he has no interest in buying the apartment either.
Before we get to Ramona’s horrific performance at Shabbat dinner – which everyone thinks of as a Seder, which is a whole different thing – there are a few brief interludes with the other characters. Eboni discovers that his DNA has matches in the online records, so a nice lady named Linda, who wears particularly attractive jeans, will try to find the clusters that match Eboni’s DNA and try to triangulate exactly who is. his father.
Next is an appointment for Sonja Tremont Morgan of Wind Breaker Gas Displacement Pills Morgans. I trusted Devyn, Eboni’s friend. I really did. Then she installed my favorite floozy with a pair of cracked Ray-Ban. I mean, what’s up with this guy? He’s in commercial real estate, which he admits was in deep shit before the pandemic completely wiped him out. He sold his house in the south of France. He’s on his fourth back surgery and it’s not even due to some kind of exotic accident. Sonja guesses all the usual suspects, skiing, tennis, falling off Diddy’s yacht because Carmen Electra tries to spray you with a bottle of champagne and Dennis Rodman tries to give you a purple nurple. But no. None of those things. He just has a “bad spine.”
Then this Brandon character, who was clearly lying in his profile photos, doesn’t want to have dessert with Sonja. She talks about how she wants to see him again, and he says they will, but they won’t. That wet Roman candle that won’t light is going to say that Sonja, our Sonja, isn’t good enough for him, a man whose body is the exact shape of a Cadbury Crème Egg in a heat wave. No wonder all these women are single. There isn’t an eligible bachelor in Manhattan who hasn’t married their nanny.
Let’s move on to the dinner hosted at a Summit, New Jersey home, as nothing is happening this season in Manhattan except the women boarding various sun-dried party buses. This “Black Shabbat” as Eboni calls it, or “Black Sabbath” as Sonja calls it, brings together some of her black friends with whom she traveled in Israel, her Jewish friend Archie and the real housewives of New York. Most of the time, what he gathered was Ramona’s voice with everyone’s exasperated ears.
Leah was exposed to COVID and had to self-quarantine, so the only Jewish member of the cast (well, once she converts) has to jump. But she insists on Zooming in on the debates. OK fine. It’s one thing if you set her up next to Elijah’s chair and she just watches, but Leah thinks she’s going to be an active part of this dinner. She talks to women insisting that they listen to her and at times shouting as the action unfolds. Ramona is reprehensible about this dinner party, but the only thing she’s right about is trying to hang up Leah five minutes after dinner starts. A solo conference call does not participate in an in-person meeting. This is exactly what Gd had planned. (But props to Luann after Leah sang her prayer for saying, “Boom, you can sing,” as if Luann knew what a good voice would look like if it fell from the sky and gave him a Coke Zero.)
Ramona begins as soon as they arrive, telling Archie, the party’s host, that his towels are ugly and way too big. Once Archie tells Ramona that she made them herself, she continues to laugh at them, trying to make a blouse out of them. I don’t remember Sonja getting this hot when she tried to pretend JP Morgan’s sheets were towels a few seasons ago. Next, Ramona tries to explain to Archie how Challah bread (unrelated to Heather “Holla” Thompson) is like the Ukrainian bread she grew up with, as if Ramona knew more about what was about to happen than the woman. who planned everything apart.
The real problem begins when Archie explains that she worries about the relationship between Jews and the black community. Ramona pipes in the sense that Italians have a lot in common with Jews too because they both love tradition. She learned it by watching violin on the roof to Nolita. Eboni tries to explain that there is something different when two groups of oppressed people come together in their struggles because they are all fighting against white supremacy. Ramona says she cares too. Everyone cares. Eboni responds with the fact that she is the only one to have suffered an award.
Ramona can’t take this. She then tells us that she was rejected by Jewish children when she went to college because she was a Christian. I mean OK. Sure. It may have happened. Maaaaaay-be it is true. But there is more to this story. Why was she surrounded by so many Jews, and why were they all against her? Is it because she kept saying offensive things like she does during this event? Does it have anything to do with the Jewish man she was engaged to whom she dumped because he didn’t properly thank her for changing her religion? I’m going to need a statement from one of these Jewish children before I can pass judgment.
As Archie tries to tell Ramona it must have been painful, but they’ll respond to his pain in a minute, Leah yells at him on the phone that it’s not white people right now, and Eboni, once. moreover, tries to figure out how to prevent his new colleagues from breaking up all that is dear to him. Ramona says, “No one is going to listen to me,” and gets up and walks away, which is a classic Ramona strategy. Everyone is angry that she left when she comes back to the table and she says, “I went to pee. God. I can’t pee now! Now all she does is hijack and cover up. She casts bad behavior as if they are so many ninja stars, hoping that one of them will blind, bloody or maim everyone present so that she doesn’t have to sit with it. his own bad opinions.
The way she defends herself, the “all lives matter” of it all, seems to be Fox News talking points. But Ramona is not that calculated; she is not that trained. I was trying to figure out where this animus came from when Eboni fully elucidated it. She says Ramona cannot remain uncomfortable in the face of racial or religious oppression. She cannot just listen and consider her part in the struggles of others. She needs it to be about her too. She needs to see her part in any narrative because, as a white, narcissistic person, that’s what she’s used to.
Ramona is now done talking about how she cried at night wanting to be Jewish and is now just marauding around the party with garden variety rudeness. She fixes everyone on the fact that she hasn’t eaten all day and how she lost the three pounds she gained over Thanksgiving, as if someone at the table cares about her problems. weight. The editors, the real lies in every situation, give us a montage of Ramona eating all kinds of stuff on the bus ride to rebut her claim that she hasn’t eaten all day and needs to eat now.
She then takes charge of the dinner, goes into the kitchen and tells them that she must eat immediately as if it is not a cultural dinner where there is a planned menu that she should graciously participate in. She tells them that she doesn’t want what they have in the kitchen because they are not healthy snacks. She demands chicken. She must have chicken now, and she’ll burn this whole house down if that means she doesn’t have to listen to how blacks and Jews could have worse than her. She turns around the kitchen, she turns around the table, like a goblin making a jig, demanding, diverting, denigrating, destroying. He’s a monster, okay, and I don’t know why somebody doesn’t already give him a stake by heart.